I have become really good at regarding my attempts at mastery over my awareness (speaking here of "failed" attempts, of course) like a kind and enthralled parent regards their baby who is learning to walk. That parent loves every minute of it--the pulling up, the letting go, the teetering, the hard sit-down on diapered bottom--there's no pressure or timeline or anything at stake. That parent just loves that kid, and the kid can do no wrong. Does this mean that the parent doesn't care whether or not the kid achieves mastery of her gross motor skills? Quite the opposite, and in fact, that parent will be looking for ways in which to support that kid in her quest for mastery...and if there seems to be something wrong with the mastery achievement, such as a developmental delay, said parent is going to be on Google like bob's-your-uncle, phoning pediatricians and getting referrals. My ability to master present moment awareness without a major vacay to Dry Gulch Rehab Center is still a bit up for grabs...I may have problems bigger than I can solve with my cunning and humor. We'll see, but I'd still just rather do my own version of taking this endeavor seriously by doing this...blogging, supporting and being supported by friends, continuing with my therapist, my head meds, my start-up coach, and not least, learning to slow down and savor with Mirelle!
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